February/March 2012 - Taming Your Drunken Monkey –
Part 3 of 4
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So what is stopping you from achieving your dreams and goals? I’ll let you in on a big secret we’ve been discussing in the last two newsletters and it’s called your Drunken Monkey. Another word for the Drunken Monkey is your Conscious Mind.
Have you ever notice how your Monkey Mind never shuts up? Typically the content of what your Monkey Mind says is fear based, negative and really creates big obstacles to your achieving your dreams. Why is this? Well, as we’ve been discussing in our last two newsletters, your Drunken Monkey has one main purpose and that is to keep you alive and survive. It does this by throwing every negative thought and concern your way. Have you ever heard this inside your head? “You can’t do that”. “Who do you think you are?” “You know it’s not going to work.” “They’ll just laugh at you, why try!” etc.
You want to achieve your dreams not just survive, so how in the world are you suppose to succeed when your Drunken Monkey keeps bringing up every conceivable negative fear based thought? On top of that and worst yet, if you’re not “aware” of how it functions you might actually believe your Monkey Mind.
If you haven’t read part 1 and part 2 of this article I highly suggest you check it out. You will find part 1 in my December 2011 newsletter and part 2 in my January 2012 newsletter.
As we discussed in our January newsletter, the antidote to being caught up by your Drunken Monkey is “awareness”. If you’re aware of how and why the your Monkey Mind operates and what motivates it (fear), you no longer have to be caught up by it, but you can actually start to laugh at the ridiculous incessant messages of negativity.
Now let’s look at another layer to all of this. Why do you want to achieve a particular goal? What will it give you? It doesn’t matter what the goal is; it might be to go back to school and learn a new skill. It might be losing weight, improving relationships, buying that dream home, etc. In the end, what you really want is to feel good. Perhaps attaining your goal would allow you to feel accomplished or loved, or happy, etc. The point is what we really want in the end is to feel good. Wouldn’t you agree?
You see the real trick here is “feeling good”. When you feel good, you attract more positive people, situations and resources into your life that will help you achieve your goals. When you feel bad you attract negative situations and experiences into your life. The truth is, what you focus on you simply get more of. For example: if your Monkey Mind keeps saying “You’re not good enough” and you believe it, then you’re going to keep drawing to you more situations that reflect that belief. What you believe or focus on creates your behavior and that behavior will either attract or repel what you say you actually want. When those negative situations show up it simply reinforces to you your belief that you’re not good enough. This is how habitual limiting beliefs simply get reinforced over and over again. You might begin to see here if you do pay attention to your negative Drunken Monkey that it will only keep you stuck, and achieving your dreams and goals will be that much more difficult to achieve. You need to understand that your Monkey Mind for the most part is not your friend when it comes to succeeding. It has one important purpose and that is to keep you safe and to survive and it does that with fear. It’s important to see that Monkey Mind for what it is and for the most part it’s like a wild animal that needs to be controlled.
It’s important to say that not all negative thoughts coming from your conscious mind are bad. For example: if you’re walking down a dark street and someone strange and unsavory seems to be following you and you feel fearful, that would be appropriate. You want to be safe. However, if you’re walking into a room to give a talk at work and your Monkey Mind is saying things like: “You’re going to fail”, or “Everyone in the room will laugh at you”, this is the type of incessant negative mind talk that will not work in your favor and quite frankly your Monkey Mind has no idea of how you’re talk is going to go. Your Monkey Mind is not a psychic, it is simply trying to protect you, but in the end it is limiting you.
By the way, I’d like to recommend a book to you that will help you become more aware of what you believe and feel and will help you shift your negative emotions towards what you really want to attract. Check out the book: Ask and It Is Given by Esther and Jerry Hicks. It’s available at amazon.com and other book stores.
You see you’re always attracting every second of the day. The question is: are you attracting what you want, or don’t want?
Now back to your Monkey Mind. The blessing of life is that you have the freedom to create and draw into your life anything you desire. However, the problem is the Monkey Mind honestly doesn’t care if you succeed. You see your Monkey Mind was originally created and designed to operate in highly dangerous environments and worlds that few of us still live in. If you were a cave man and ran into a Saber-Tooth Tiger you bet you needed to be afraid. Fast forward to now, your Monkey Mind is still looking for danger, or still looking for the
Saber-Tooth Tiger. The freedom that your Monkey Mind attempted to create for you in ancient times by keeping you safe now limits you by its very design. That fact of the matter is 95% of what we’re fearful of or worried about never happens. Esther and Jerry Hicks share that “worry is rehearsing for what you don’t want.” This is based on the concept that what ever you give focus or energy to, you attract. So why are you listening to it?
Let’s talk a little bit about the biology. As far as your body goes it is made up of 60-90 trillion cells all working together in harmony. You have mistaken your mind and your thoughts as being you when it is simply energy (random noise) moving through your brain cells. If you can learn to simply observe the behavior of your Monkey Mind you will be less likely to get caught up by it and take it seriously. A great way to look at this is with detachment. Try this viewpoint on for size: You are not your Drunken Monkey. You are not even your body; you’re simply observing what is going on. By learning to detach from what your Monkey Mind is saying and learn to laugh at it, you will be free of its attempts to limit you through fear.
There are 5 steps to taming the Drunken Monkey and here they are summarized:
- Practice ignoring the constant judging of others and self. Your Monkey Mind loves to judge not only you but others and it is one way it tries to make itself superior, keeping you trapped in negativity.
- Practice laughing at the Drunken Monkey Like you would watch a T.V. show.
- Practice noticing what your next thought will be. This is a very interesting experiment. Just think to yourself: “I wonder what the next thought will be”, and the next thought, and the next thought….? If you start noticing in a very detached way, everything will change.
- Relate to the Drunken Monkey like a pet. Say to it something like: “Oh, you’re so funny”, or, “Calm down, you’re OK”. Think about how you try to calm down a barking dog. Your Monkey Mind loves to obsess. Talk back to it with something like: “Oh, you’re just trying to keep me safe.”
- Notice how the Drunken Monkey is…habitual, instinctive and automatic. It’s like a train on a train track. One of the best ways to get out of your Monkey Mind is to get into a service mindset. What I mean by “service mindset” is, focusing on others or trying to be of service to others. By doing so, not only do you feel great, but you take the focus off that Monkey Mind for a while.
When you begin to notice the Drunken Monkey for what it is, the chatter begins to disappear or sound different. By doing so, you will become more present to the infinite silence and peace within you. You will be more fully present with yourself and others.
In my April 2012 newsletter I’ll be sharing part 4 (the last of the series) of Taming Your Drunken Monkey. Originally this was going to be a 3 part series, but there is so much more I want to share with you. Feel free to forward these articles to your friends, family and colleagues. You can simply use the “Forward” link at the bottom of this newsletter. If you’re interested in accelerating your dreams and goals, consider a session or two with hypnosis. In as little as 1 or 2 sessions I you can help you permanently release old negative emotions and limiting beliefs. What do you want to create or attract for your life in 2012? The sky’s the limit!
(Note: I want to thank and credit Matthew Ferry, Inspired Action Coach, for his great work in this area, and with whom I’ve studied with, which includes the ideas and concepts for this 4 part series.)
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